Practice makes perfect right?
I remember when I first started consciously meditating and how frustrating it was. My brain was constantly trying to figure out if I was doing it correctly, then every minute I had an itch that needed to be scratched somewhere. Thoughts from yesterday and tomorrow would aggressively flood my 15 minutes of stillness.
Yet, what kept me going were the results I saw from a boyfriend I was dating at the time. His entire demeanor since he began meditation had completely transformed into a person in the [Now]. Smiling and laughing became a frequent new habit of his, joy was infectious whenever he entered the room and I wanted "IN" on the secret of his sudden change.
So "Bill", explained what little knowledge he had on the topic, and sat me down on my bedroom floor.
" Close your eyes, and just breathe."
I wasn't sure if he wanted to take a nap sitting up, or patiently wait until the alarm sounded off.
The first day I felt more relaxed than usual, but wasn't satisfied enough to believe this was what the hype was all about. So let Youtube's name be praised for the thousands of search results on meditation, and all the new found data on what to avoid.
Thus, the fun truly began. My meditative practice became apart of my daily lifestyle. The creativity that went into my stillness never ceased. I was learning about my third eye and the chakra system in my body. My self proclaimed title was Indigo child, crystals of all shapes and colors were piled in my pockets, and lets not forget the armpit smelling sage my roommates hated that I burned. (almost daily)
Meditation became my new fix.
Hours of laying in the grass listening to binaural beats had taken over my world, and I finally did it!
My happiness level increased, I experienced senses of mine that I didn't know existed, and I was truly at peace with who/what I was.
The only thing that lacked was balance. My online business completely stopped with no inspiration to financially support myself, friends were not as important as my practice, and brute honesty became overwhelming for those around me.
This is not the outcome of consistent meditation for everyone. It just so happens that my journey led me to the most magical and challenging experiences I would have never expected. Through that imbalance I met a teacher who taught me about neutrality and being centered within my practice and daily life.
The training never ends, and the journey of the practice is always perfect. Trust yourself and where you are in your spiritual walk. If you so choose to consciously continue - know that you're in for a ride!